Your Future Defines Your Happiness.

Hello my dear readers! I had a wonderful week! I finally finished my skirt, and it turned out so cute! I wasn't sewing for two months and now I am very happy to get back to this wonderful and useful hobby. But this is not what I want to talk about today. I want to share some useful, from my point of view, information which changed my understanding of happiness and positivity a little bit.

Here is the link to the video for today's post: Your Future Defines Your Happiness.

Before you read further, please take a pause and think, how do you usually see your future? Is it bright and positive more often, or it mostly is seen as something scary and negative?

After you have done this quick exercise, let's move on to the information that I want to share.

For the past 120 yeas psychology believed that it needed to be focused on the past and the present. And that you need to analyze past events, your memories, and your present feelings and perceptions in order to be more resilient and productive. Not long time ago when positive psychology started to develop, psychologists found out that the future was the key driver. It is not your past or your present that defines your happiness, but the way you project your future.

We think about future more than 50% of our time. Even when it looks like we think about the past, we actually apply these thoughts and experiences to the projection of the future. The same thing with present. You can right now read these words and think how they might help you in future. So if you picture for whatever reason some scary scenarios of your future, you most likely will develop depression and helplessness, you will have lack of energy and will not be very productive. On other hand, if you see your future as something amazing, you will keep working on your projects, will be energized and positive.

I would like to share three ideas which might be helpful in terms of thinking about future.

1. Good Planning. I noticed that the more organized I am, the more sense of control I have. This sense of control give the sense of security. We feel more safe, when we believe that our future depends on us. The more I plan, and the more tasks I complete, the better I feel. The more willpower I cultivate within myself by completing my tasks, the more trust and confidence I gain. So if you want to reduce the amount of worries about your future, try to be more organized and more disciplined.

2. Mindfulness. Sometimes we just need to take a break from thoughts about the future. You can do it by meditating and focusing on something that is going on right now. It can be focusing on your breath, washing your dishes, walking, and so on. When your mind starts to wonder, gently bring it back to the object of present moment. It reminds me of restarting the computer. Sometimes it can slow down, when you have too many open programs, too many tasks, and you restart it and then keep working. Give yourself a break once a day for at least a minute!

3. Don't Believe Your Thoughts. Mind is so scared of everything. Our ancestors lived in a very dangerous environment. And part of our brain still have these survival habits, even nowadays, when life is not that dangerous. But we got used to stick to negative scenarios, thinking, that it will help us to avoid difficulties. It reality we don't know what will happen. Most of our scary thoughts, never take place in real life. And even if they do, they don't have that huge impact on our lives as we thought. The anticipation of negative event is much more frightening, than event itself. Life is not extremely easy to begin with, so why would you add more difficulties by picturing some depressing stories in your head? When you have these negative thoughts about future, remind yourself, that these are just thoughts, that nothing bad happened yet, that you are strong enough to overcome difficulties, even if they really take place, and that due to your resilient, you will be fine no matter what. I noticed that most of the times people are much stronger, than they think they are. Please remember about it!

In the end I want to remind the main point of this article: happiness is not so much about your past or present, it depends a lot on how you picture your future. And as you are the one who writes these stories, you are the one who has control over them. Please work on your "writing style", don't be too dramatic and try to be more positive!

Be Strong And Love Yourself!

From Dasha With Love!

Love Wins!